my big boy

I am insanely bored right now. I'm so anxious. I want to do something but really have no idea what? I know right now would be a great time to clean the house..but I have no motivation to do it. There's nothing good on tv, there's nothing fun on the internet..I need a hobby. When we were on vacation Kenna and I made soy candles. I really loved it! I would really like to get into candle making. I think it would be sooo much fun! And I love doing crafty things. Of course I'd love to scrap book..but really don't have the time for it. I guess digital scrapbooking would be a better choice as far as all that goes. But I don't feel like getting into that. Anyways, Tim thinks it's a good idea for me to get into candle making. I burn candles all the time..LOVE soy candles! It would be great to make my own and to be able to give them as gifts. I'd love to take some college classes. But there's really not any time for that right now. Lately I've really been reassing my life..Mikhail is going to school SOON. Like real school real soon. I realized that this is the last winter he'll be here at home with me, this will be the last spring, and the last summer..Then my little boy will be in school until he's grown and moves out of the house. I've got to make the most of the time we do have together before he runs off to school. I've also had to start thinking about the things that Mikhail needs to learn before he goes to school..and it's not letters or numbers or things like that. He needs to learn how to listen because that's what big boys do. He needs to learn to listen the first time I tell him to do something. He needs to learn to give his 'task' his all. I seriously think that Mikhail is a.d.d. I really wouldn't doubt it..because I think Tim and I both are. I don't want to medicate my four year old. I just think that's insane and I think we can figure this out on our own. I really want to put him into karate so he'll learn to focus. I think it would be great for him. I know that I can't keep punishing him like I do at the house. When he acts up, I take away his video games, or I threaten to take things away ect. I know his school teachers aren't going to do that. They are just going to insist that he listens because that's what he's supposed to do. That's how I'm going to start treating him. I don't know I guess I'm really nervous about him starting school. The thought of waiting until he's six to start him crossed my mind..I know he'd be a little more mature. But then that messes everyone's starting year up. Mikhail will go this up coming year, Makenna will go the year after that, I'll have a year at home with just the twins, and then BOOM they go. I don't know what I will do when that year comes. I guess that will kind of be the year I find my self outside of motherhood. Of course I will still be doing all the home room mom stuff, I will be on the PTA..I will be picking them up and having a snack ready for them when they get home, actually having a clean house...lol I know there will be a whole different part of mother hood I haven't expierenced yet. But I will have some time to myself that I'll be able to go to school, or work, or have an awesome hobby that will maybe even make me some money :) It will just be kind of neat to discover a new part of myself. But I'm not wishing these last couple years of my babies being home away. I'm wishing them to be the best years ever..it just inspires me to do even more fun stuff with them and take them on even more awesome adventures :) This spring and summer is going to be the best! I just know it :)

I didn't really set a new years resolution..except to just do better at being a SAHM..I know that I do the best I can with the kids..but that means sometimes neglecting the house work, or my relationship with Tim...and I don't want to do that anymore. I've been waking up every morning and getting the kids brekfast right away, making Tim lunch, doing lots of projects with the kids, and working on the house a lot more. I feel good with the improvements I'm making and just hope to do good at keeping up with them. I've noticed Tim is a lot happier with the way I've been keeping up with things too. I just wish I wasn't so tired at the end of the day..it would be awesome to tackle this house after the kids go to bed..I just feel completely exhausted :/